top 10
COUNTDOWN OF THE 10 MOST IMPORTANT THINGS I LEARNED IN 2007:
10. A bachelors degree does not guarantee you a job. it WILL guarantee that you will have no money, AND poor credit history. but it will NOT guarantee you a job.
9. NEVER agree to go out on a date with your hairstylist...not only will it go badly, (which it can't help but do) but when its over, you'll have to find yourself a new stylist...and quite possibly, a new salon.
8. There is no such thing as an expendable income. it is a figment of donald trump's imagination. normal people DO NOT jet-set. normal people DO NOT buy clothes or eat out. normal people DO NOT get coffee at starbucks. starbucks is for rich people. normal people, like new college graduates with rent to pay, realize that for the cost of ONE grande frappaccino, one could buy enough coffee to last them a month. for this reason: NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT BUY GRANDE FRAPPACCINOS.
7. Living by oneself is NOT for the faint of heart. near-death experiences tend to occur alarmingly often, especially since there is no one to question, whether you really want to try the mind-numblingly stupid thing, you ARE obviously about to try.
6. Chocolate should be tax-free. because like bread and milk, chocolate is a necessity of life.
5. Financial independence is a misleading term. one tends to overlook the "financial" and see only the "independence." 'Financial Independence' is really the name of the incredibly large man who sits on your chest to keep you from breathing easily ever again.
for this reason, anyone who tells you to enjoy your adolescence, obviously knows something you don't. LISTEN TO THEM.
4. GOOD college friends are the ones who keep in touch when you move 4 states away,
GREAT college friends are the ones who hang out with you, when you move 4 states back again.
3. Grocery shopping is a tricky expense. initially, you might think that the cheapest option is to NOT buy food, or at least, to buy very little of it. however, while this will save you in one area, it will cost you down the road: when you find yourself having to replace all of your jeans. since the cost of the second expense might exceed the savings of the first, your options should be considered accordingly.
2. The small u-haul that says it rents for $19.95 is lying. u-haul is a liar. moving is expensive. living is expensive. its cheaper to stay where you are and stop living.
1. Life is full of bumps. the bumps hurt. but fortunately (eventhough at times it might seem unfortunate) life goes on. NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS: when the bottom falls out, you will not fall through. you take the leap, and find the courage as you fall. and somehow, against all odds, you WILL live through this.
afterall, you have no choice...someone has to pay the rent when you're gone. ;)
10. A bachelors degree does not guarantee you a job. it WILL guarantee that you will have no money, AND poor credit history. but it will NOT guarantee you a job.
9. NEVER agree to go out on a date with your hairstylist...not only will it go badly, (which it can't help but do) but when its over, you'll have to find yourself a new stylist...and quite possibly, a new salon.
8. There is no such thing as an expendable income. it is a figment of donald trump's imagination. normal people DO NOT jet-set. normal people DO NOT buy clothes or eat out. normal people DO NOT get coffee at starbucks. starbucks is for rich people. normal people, like new college graduates with rent to pay, realize that for the cost of ONE grande frappaccino, one could buy enough coffee to last them a month. for this reason: NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT BUY GRANDE FRAPPACCINOS.
7. Living by oneself is NOT for the faint of heart. near-death experiences tend to occur alarmingly often, especially since there is no one to question, whether you really want to try the mind-numblingly stupid thing, you ARE obviously about to try.
6. Chocolate should be tax-free. because like bread and milk, chocolate is a necessity of life.
5. Financial independence is a misleading term. one tends to overlook the "financial" and see only the "independence." 'Financial Independence' is really the name of the incredibly large man who sits on your chest to keep you from breathing easily ever again.
for this reason, anyone who tells you to enjoy your adolescence, obviously knows something you don't. LISTEN TO THEM.
4. GOOD college friends are the ones who keep in touch when you move 4 states away,
GREAT college friends are the ones who hang out with you, when you move 4 states back again.
3. Grocery shopping is a tricky expense. initially, you might think that the cheapest option is to NOT buy food, or at least, to buy very little of it. however, while this will save you in one area, it will cost you down the road: when you find yourself having to replace all of your jeans. since the cost of the second expense might exceed the savings of the first, your options should be considered accordingly.
2. The small u-haul that says it rents for $19.95 is lying. u-haul is a liar. moving is expensive. living is expensive. its cheaper to stay where you are and stop living.
1. Life is full of bumps. the bumps hurt. but fortunately (eventhough at times it might seem unfortunate) life goes on. NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS: when the bottom falls out, you will not fall through. you take the leap, and find the courage as you fall. and somehow, against all odds, you WILL live through this.
afterall, you have no choice...someone has to pay the rent when you're gone. ;)
posted by julie at 12:39 AM
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